What the hell does it even mean to be productive anyway. They said it's "the efficiency of production". Be it reading, working, studying, working out. What I get from all this is. Basically anything that isn't being on social media all day, stay at home 24/7 to watch Movies or play video games. Wasting the time. A surprisingly hard task to manage.
There's this video from mina le titled You Don't Need To Be Productive. That the main point being, well, you don't need to be productive! From my understanding, what she's trying to say is the current society pushed for everyone to be productive and stressed on those who aren't, even when they're just relaxing in their free time. How you NEED to monetize your hobbies, how free time is for side hustle and extra money. How you're shamed for enjoy simple pastime like watching TV, and how you should be knitting in your free time instead! How time is soooo valuable that you should do something, something of value in every moment of your life, rather than wasting it Doomscrolling and things like that.
It's definitely something I've also felt for a while, but never put it into words or try to figured what about it is wrong. I'm one of those kids who constantly feel the urge to watch "productivity content" in my free time on Youtube to not feel guilty about myself, how I'm spending my time doing something. And there's a few moments when I realized "This is crazy, why would we torture ourselves like this!?" but I still aspire to be like those youtubers with neat little timeblocks and schedules and daily habits todo list, even though I knew there's a chance 80% of this is for the show.
What I disagree with Mina though, is that I can't afford to not be productive. It isn't possible! I do am wasting my time! I need to be productive, or I'll failed my exams. I need to be productive, or else the goals I want for myself will never come to fruition. I WANT to be productive, because if not, I won't be able to achieve those things. And when I failed, it feels HORRIBLE to remember that I spend all those hours scrolling when if only, if only I was productive, I probably wouldn't fail.
The watching of productivity content and "finding the perfect system" are a fucking problem in of itself. Because it allowed me to cheat myself, making me k I've done something productive when in reality I just watched a youtube video. I spend probably up to ten hours (and maybe more) customizing Obsidian at this point, and before this I did the same with Notion hoping the pretty graph would motivate me. In the first four days of anything it kind of did. I set up a new task system, I want to fill it! But after that four day, I'll get bored of it and just revert to normal.
I'm still finding "the perfect solution" knowing full well it doesn't exist.